recovery 2.0, addiction

Tommy Rosen: How to Find Recovery and Thrive

I recently had the pleasure of speaking with Tommy Rosen, host of Recovery 2.0, yoga teacher and addiction recovery expert. He shares his wisdom about recovery, the benefits of yoga and what inspired him to create his amazing Online Conference.

Parents to PhDs

Without further ado, I am very pleased to welcome Tommy Rosen!

What inspired you to create Recovery 2.0? What do you hope your listeners will gain from the program?

TR: The inspiration for Recovery 2.0: Beyond Addiction Online Conference came from my own personal journey through recovery.

What that looked like was that I came from a background of fairly extreme drug addiction and alcoholism. I got sober, found recovery, initially going to Hazeldon, in Minnesota, and then luckily found the 12 step path.

I worked the 12 steps for many years, growing and learning quite a bit. Being relieved of the acute symptoms of addiction, I then learned in recovery that there are many layers to the onion.

In order to find true peace, true contentment, my claim to fame needed to be more than I’ve survived addiction. I wanted to thrive in life and what I found was there were certain ingredients for someone like me to thrive and those ingredients were three things:

1) Yoga – Learning how to connect with my breath, learning how to move, learning how to get comfortable in my own body. That piece was very, very important.

2) Meditation – Learning about meditation from a variety of difference disciplines and perspectives, to calm the mind and to be able to open up to the greater forces. That was very important.

3) The Lifestyle of Health and Wellness which includes a huge overhaul in diet and taking a look at all the things that you ingest in your day.

Those ingredients, when coupled with the work of the 12 steps and other spiritual philosophies made for what I call true recovery.

It took my recovery to the next level. I brought people together who were great teachers, authors, writers, speakers and presenters and I put them together into this conference, called Recovery 2.0, so people could learn a lot of the things that I have been blessed with along the way.

 

recovery 2.0, addiction

What are the benefits of yoga for those in recovery?

TR: When you start talking about recovery, in my estimation everybody is recovering from something. Some of us are just recovering from poor breathing. Some of us are recovering from thinking too much or being disconnected from our food, our body or having poor relationships or traumas of different kinds.

Almost every human being walking this earth can be on a path of personal transformation. That is what I think of when I say recovery. Yoga is a path of personal transformation just the same as the 12 steps and many other spiritual paths. They compliment each other.

Yoga is about connection. It’s about union, the union of body, mind and spirit, the union of breath and movement with the quieting of the mind, the developing of health, flexibility and strength in the body. All of these things are positive assets when it comes to recovering from addiction.

Addiction is really, quite frankly the opposite. Addiction is being disconnected from our minds, from our bodies and from our spirit.

Yoga is something that brings us back into alignment, bring us back to our focus in the practice of yoga postures and yoga movements. We have to focus on our breath, we have to focus on the movement and the alignment of our body.

Guided by a great teacher, we’ll be focusing on certain parts of our body and certain aspects of the practice.  We’ll find that at the end of the 90 minute practice, it’s the first time we’ve actually paid attention to ourselves for 90 minutes, maybe in our lifetime.

It’s one of the most intimate, fulfilling and amazing acts we can actually embark upon with ourselves. I think one of the reasons why yoga has gained such popularity in recent years is because people are getting a hit of this feeling of elation, this high in a very natural way and they need it more and more with the craziness of this world.

People are actually feeling that yoga is not a give or take proposition, it is a necessary thing. We have to have it. It is exciting.

 

beyond addiction

 

What advice would you give to parents once they realize their child is dependent or has become addicted to drugs or alcohol?

TR: There is so much to say to parents. I have to preface this by saying I do not have children, but I was somebody’s child at one point. I really witnessed a lot of mistakes and I’ve thought a lot about those mistakes. In my last 20 years of recovery, I’ve counseled a lot of parents.

Most kids don’t start off with hard drugs, they start with the more prevalent drugs which they’ll find around them, usually marijuana, alcohol or cigarettes.

The first thing I tell parents is to remember what the goal is. The goal for your child is to be healthy, happy, to be able to make decisions for themselves, to be able to self reflect and self correct. That is the goal.

No one can expect their child to not make mistakes. Everybody makes mistakes. Can your child reflect upon their own experience and adjust future decisions based upon what they’ve learned? That is all we can hope for as parents is that our children will be able to make good decisions, based on the experiences that they’ve had.

An example would be if you drank too much alcohol and you ended up throwing up or worse, you would look at that experience and you would say, “That was not a pleasant experience for me.” You would learn from that experience. The goal is that you would continue to learn from mistakes that you make or from the successes that you’ve had.

Too often parents go into the discussions with their kids in a more penalizing kind of way. The goal is that at all costs, they have to stop drinking and they have to stop using drugs, so that takes the focus off the experience of the child, teenager or the adult.

Now, it places it in the realm of criminalizing their behavior. All the focus is on the substance or the behavior around the substance. That is a terrible mistake. If your kid is smoking pot, drinking and they’re actually enjoying it and you come in there as a parent and say, “No, no, no, absolutely not,” it just puts a rift between you and them. What we want is to inspire our kids to make good decisions.

How do we inspire somebody away from the substances? It’s the same question of how do you get a dog off of a bone. You throw the dog a stick and then it leaves the bone alone.

You can’t break a habit, as much as you can replace a habit with something else that is more inspiring. As parents, the idea is that we have to inspire our kids.

If we find that maybe we haven’t done a great job of that or if we are not feeling connected with our child who is 15 or 16, in the middle of  the individualization process, and we don’t seem to have any control over our children like we used to and that whole issue, maybe the parents are not the ones that do the inspiring.

Find your kids great mentors, teachers, or guides. This could be a therapist, or a Karate teacher, a yoga teacher, or an athletic coach. A number of people could come into your kid’s life and inspire them on to greatness.

They can get them interested in the things that are going to be good for their body, good for their mind, rather than having them go down the road of the thing that means the most to them in their life is this drug or this alcohol.

If you are starting to feel like your child is already starting to develop an addiction, meaning they can’t seem to put it down, and you are deeply concerned about your child’s well being, that is quite a different story.

The key is trying to find a way to communicate with this child, whether that is you or another person. Once a child crosses that line into acute addiction, it is very difficult for parents to know because the kid is going to try and hide it as much as possible.

You need to break through to help the child and see what is happening. Once you see the truth of what’s happening, that denial can be broken. Steps can be taken to get help.

That help can be therapy, or some kind of 12 step meeting. That can be in patient or out patient rehabilitation. There are a lot of choices.

What kept you going in your darkest hour during your disease. Why did you decide to seek recovery? What gave you hope?

TR: I want to give you two perspectives on this. When I was in my darkest hours, my level of awareness was at an all time low. I would say that right now my level of awareness is at an all time high.

Now, I can reflect back and tell you what kept me going and what made the difference for me. I can tell you from where I’m sitting today, but I wouldn’t have been able to tell you then.

I wouldn’t have known what it was, but now I can tell you that it was the love of my family. They never gave up on me. They may have given me a really hard time. I was giving them a really hard time. We were at odds.

We had a really rough sort of run there, but they never lost interest in my safety and protection. That meant a lot to me, even though I would never have admitted it at the time.

When I reach my bottom and picked up the phone and called my father, he was there for me. I could have called my mother, and she would have been there for me too.

My parents weren’t going to be there to enable me. They were going to be there for me at that point, because they knew I had a problem. Although, they didn’t know the extent of it, they knew that there was a big problem.

They were there to send me to get help. When I asked for help, they were there to send me to somewhere where I could get that help. That was key.

There is a spirit within me. Even with all the darkness, I wanted to survive. I didn’t want to die. I wanted to survive. Looking for something in all the wrong places and in all the wrong ways, I just got so far off track. There was faith in myself, even at the bottom.

I don’t feel that I decided to seek recovery.  I was cornered by my behavior. That’s just being honest. I didn’t feel that I had any other way to turn.

I had reached that point where I had no money. There was certainly no girl that would be within a twenty foot radius of me. I had lost many friends and I had very little respect for myself. Being disconnected from my family, there was really nobody I could call.

I feel like if I had had money, I might have bought myself some comfort in some way, shape or form. If there was a girl there to take care of me, I might have manipulated her and worked that angle.

At the bottom, you are looking for any way out, except to admit that you have failed in life and that your best efforts have led you to this place. It’s a very hard thing to look at. I was cornered, so I had no choice, but to ask for help.

Looking out three to five years, what would you like to see as some of the next big trends in addiction treatment and recovery system?

TR: What I want to see is a more holistic approach to addiction and recovery. I want people to help newcomers understand and debunk the myths, confusion, alienation and the misunderstanding about 12 step programs.

I think there is a real misunderstanding about what goes on in those meetings and what the program is. It is such an incredible journey and such a wonderful thing. I think if people only understood it better that there wouldn’t be such a barrier to entry.

I feel that people are so scared of it. It is one of the coolest things going on on the planet today and if people only realized it, that they might get sober even sooner. They might find more success.

There needs to be mandatory yoga and meditation. Obviously, you can’t do that to someone who is just getting sober, but I think that it needs to be introduced once a person is detoxed off of whatever substance they have been doing, or whatever the behavior is.

Yoga is a path that leads to true healing, happiness and a successful thriving life. It needs to be introduced early.

Finally, the diet piece. A very strong communication needs to be made about the food we eat and the addictions and the behaviors that we have.

Parents to PhDs

Tommy Rosen is a yoga teacher and addiction recovery expert who has spent the last two decades immersed in yoga, recovery and wellness. Tommy is certified in both Hatha and Kundalini Yoga and Meditation. He is one of the pioneers in the burgeoning field of Yoga and Recovery and has over twenty years of experience assisting others to holistically transcend addictions of all kinds.

He is the host of Recovery 2.0: Beyond Addiction Online Conference and also teaches annually at Esalen, Omega and Kripalu.

Be sure to follow Tommy on Facebook, and you can also find him on twitter.

What are the key ingredients in your recovery? How can yoga, mediation and diet support recovery? Let us know in comments.

If you liked this interview, please share on Facebook, Twitter and Google+. Thank you!

46 thoughts on “Tommy Rosen: How to Find Recovery and Thrive”

    1. Avatar

      Hi Alexandra,

      Yoga and meditation can make such a difference. I feel that support and a spiritual presence in our lives will help anyone thrive and fully recover. This includes family members, especially parents as well. It is a family disease and affects everyone. Take care!

  1. Avatar

    This is great! mind-body work is so important in healing and recovering from addiction and all the traumas in life. Thanks for posting and thanks to Tommy for his openness!

    1. Avatar

      Welcome Gina! I agree with you. Holistic healing can make all the difference when it comes to long term recovery for the addicted person as well as family members, including parents. Thanks so much for stopping by!

  2. Avatar

    I love the idea that everyone is recovering from something. It’s so true and I never thought of that before. All of our life is about mind body spirit so it doesn’t surprise me that it’s as applicable to recovery as much as it is to the rest of the way we live our life.

    Wonderful post Cathy and Tommy.

    Love Elle
    xoxo

    1. Avatar

      Hi Elle,

      Great point. So much good advice applies to many different areas in life. Yoga, meditation, good diet work for everyone to build a stronger life with meaning and purpose. Thanks for stopping by! xoxo

  3. Avatar

    This comment creates unity vs separation! I’ve heard it before but got it in a new way this time! “In my estimation everybody is recovering from something. Some of us are just recovering from poor breathing. Some of us are recovering from thinking too much or being disconnected from our food, our body or having poor relationships or traumas of different kinds.

    Thanks for another great interview Cathy!

    1. Avatar

      Hi Tess,

      So true. So many of the things that work for people in recovery work for anyone and vice versa. We are really one in the same. We all have our issues that we are trying to work through. We are all more alike, than different. Take care!

  4. Avatar

    Great article Cathy. We are all on our path. Some have chosen very difficult and challenging experiences. Blessings to all who are bringing their best work forward, helping the planet to ascend!

    1. Avatar

      Thanks Barbara, I’m glad you stopped by. It is heartwarming to know that there are others sharing their story and helping all of us find a path that will lead to our recovery from whatever we are struggling with.

    1. Avatar

      Hi Norma,

      I so agree that what Tommy talks about is not just for people in recovery, it is for anyone. We are all struggling with different issues throughout our life and mind, body, soul work can help keep us focused and at peace with ourselves. Take care.

  5. Avatar

    Terrific interview, Cathy! I’ve enjoyed reading Tommy’s contributions on The Daily Love for some time but you really brought him to life. Like others, I really latched on to the breathing piece.

    I especially appreciated his comments about the future of addiction recovery. Right on!

    1. Avatar

      Hi Beth,

      I’m glad that you have enjoyed reading Tommy’s contribution and that you enjoyed the interview. Being still and listening to our breath can be so calming for me and helps me to refocus. It can make a difference and help with all of our struggles. Take care!

  6. Avatar

    Such an insightful post, Cathy! I love that Tommy’s approach is such a holistic one…for too many years, there has been a disconnect for people and when they rediscover that connection within themselves, it all changes.

    1. Avatar

      Hi Sherie,

      Yoga and meditation are definitely tools to help find that connection with ourselves. It can make such a difference and it is great to role models like Tommy leading the way. The holistic approach makes so much sense.

    1. Avatar

      Hi Tom,

      I liked Tommy’s thoughts on that as well. When children learn how to monitor themselves, they can better learn from their experiences and have a better change of staying on track.

    1. Avatar

      I agree, Meryl. Meditation can make such a difference in our lives and help us with our struggles. Appreciate you stopping by.

  7. Avatar

    Cathy,
    I really enjoyed this post. It’s very realistic. I like the idea of having mentor’s in our children’s lives, too. I also love yoga and love the idea that it, along with meditation, can be part of a healing process.
    Thanks!

    1. Avatar

      Hi Betsy,

      I find yoga and meditation very restorative as well. It has made a difference in my life and I can truly see the benefits. The mentor piece makes so much sense, especially is you are having a hard time communicating with your child.

    1. Avatar

      Hi Anita,

      The more support and role models that people in recovery can have the better. I know many will find Recovery 2.0 of great interest. Take care.

  8. Avatar

    Such a compelling story! I am happy to see a holistic approach being recommended. Bless you in your work!

  9. Avatar

    Wonderful interview, Cathy and Tommy. I loved your answer to your question, Tommy – “How do we inspire somebody away from the substances? It’s the same question of how do you get a dog off of a bone. You throw the dog a stick and then it leaves the bone alone.

    You can’t break a habit, as much as you can replace a habit with something else that is more inspiring.”

    And I totally agree, we need to understand and promote “a more holistic approach to addiction and recovery.”

    Thanks for sharing your insights.

    1. Avatar

      Thanks Lisa,

      I found that so helpful as well. When parents provide opportunities for kids to follow their passions, it can make such a difference. Finding something more exciting than drugs and alcohol can be a key ingredient to making better choices. Thanks for stopping by.

  10. Avatar

    last but not least…..me! perfectly timed post – funny how “perfect timings” become more common in recovery, whereas before it was never the right time for anything other than a drink! Just wanted to share that I am 3.5 years into recovery and like Tommy, more awake than ever in my life. My 23 year old son, however is headed in the other direction. Binge gambling and drinking has today, led to his parter to kicking him out the house…they have a 18 month old and another due in June. My wife, who hasn’t sought any help during either during my drinking or since, has closed the door on him, banning him from our home too. I stand in the middle, watching it playing out, and asking, “what is my role”. I’ve shared my rock bottom experience with him, and he knows he’s safe from daming judgements. I’ve gotten him to a 12 step councellor too. But, and here’s the difficult point, I see no point in forcing him onto the street (yet) but my wife has no latitude left. So, I’ve left two sleeping bags in the garage tonight, and told him 1) He can sleep there but not in the house 2) To take friday night off and come to a GA meeting with me, and 3) Even though he feels like pressing the fuck it button tonight, he’s got a lot to lose yet, and 4) He’s playing with something much bigger than him. My point: being in a 12 step programme as a parent helps when working out one’s own best method of approach towards and addicted (adult) child. Namaste and LIF everyone.

    1. Avatar

      Hi Graeme,

      Welcome! Always a challenge for parents to be coping with their child’s substance abuse or the binge gambling. The important thing is you do not have to go through this alone. There are many parents in the same situation. It sounds like you have a support system in place and know that the GA meeting will be helpful. When we are talking about a loved one such as a child, a Parent Alanon meeting can help as well. Being educated and understanding addiction in all it’s forms can make such a difference. There are no easy answers. Could you and your wife discuss and come to a compromise on your boundaries, that could help your son and his family? You sound like a wonderful support for him and my hope is that he will learn from your experience. All the best to you. Thanks for sharing your story. I’m glad the interview was helpful to you.

    1. Avatar

      Hi Daniele,

      Holistic healing can make all the difference for long term health. Meditation and yoga has changed my life and you might find that it works for you as well.

  11. Avatar

    Thanks for sharing this inspirational interview Cathy. It’s so true that mindfulness techniques like yoga and meditation can be the catalyst for powerful inner and outer healing

    1. Avatar

      Hi Pat,

      Yes, there is so much more to recovery than just getting sober. Tommy is a great example of someone who is thriving. Take care.

  12. Avatar

    This was very compelling reading, Cathy. I especially liked Tommy’s gentle reminder is that the goal for kids is health, happiness and the capacity for self-reflection. He sounds like an amazing guy and this is wonderful work. Thanks for sharing it.

    1. Avatar

      Glad you enjoyed the interview, Shari. I found his insights for parents very interesting as well. Wise words that can help us look at the bigger picture. Appreciate your comment.

  13. Avatar

    I had never thought about how important yoga and meditation could be for someone dealing with addictions, as a way of reconnecting with their body and mind. Great reporting of an encounter, Cathy!

    1. Avatar

      Hi Sharon,

      Yoga and meditation are good for anyone, but someone in recovery can benefit. It helps to bring them back to themselves and to find that inner peace that they have been missing. Thank for stopping by!

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